Dr. Stephanie Murphy explains: Why Proof of Love?

Hi! I’m Dr. Stephanie Murphy, and I’ve been talking about relationships on the internet since 2008.


I want to help the listeners of this show get to know me in this post. So I’m going to share with you the answer to the question you’re probably thinking about. Why? What makes me want to talk about relationships on the internet – and what qualifies me to give advice?


Great questions. You should ask that about anyone who puts themselves out there on the internet as an “expert!”


I would say it all started when I began listening to Dan Savage’s podcast, Savage Love, in 2007. Dan had already been doing an advice column for over a decade by that point, and with the rise of podcasting as a media form in the late 2000s, he began doing a show where people could call in with their questions, and he would answer them on the air.


This was not a new concept, but it was new to me. First of all, I was touched by how many different people called in, earnestly asking for advice. And I knew that for everyone out there who took the time to call and leave a question, there were probably hundreds or thousands of others who were wondering about the exact same thing! Or at least, dealing with a situation that was similar enough that the answer to the caller’s question would be helpful for them. And then, I realized, there were many thousands of other folks who were simply listening out of curiosity, but who could then learn something through the process of casually listening.


I was definitely one of those listeners. Through a process of casual listening (OK, not always casual – sometimes the questions were totally relevant to me!) I picked up a lot of useful information. And, not only that, but I started applying what I learned in my own romantic life!

There were many other podcasts that inspired me – especially when I moved away from just listening to podcasts about sex, and started delving deeper into psychology, healing from past traumatic experiences, and personal growth. I started working on discovering my own “issues” and healing from them. It’s still an ongoing process, but through a journey of self-discovery that was sparked by listening to relationship podcasts, I reached a greater level of knowing myself and accepting myself than ever before.


That’s really why I want to talk about relationships on the internet. I think that through relating with other people, we can understand ourselves better. We can learn and grow. We can experience what (I believe) deep down, everyone wants – real connection with other people. Love! Love is definitely an enhancement to the experience of being human.


When Tatiana told me the idea for this show, I was super excited. Not only did it fit in with my “mission” of talking about relationships on the internet, but I was happy that I would be doing it with two other wise people who have something important to say. As we start off 2019, I can’t wait to see what connections we will make and what we will learn through the show this coming year. I know that there is always more to learn. So if you ever catch me acting like I know everything there is to know about relationships, give me a reality check, because I’ll tell you right now that I don’t. I’ll be learning right along with everyone else – and I’m excited about it!


Thanks for reading, and I’ll be talking with you soon…




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